Special interlude

This was an all-star consumption week. I’ll give you a bar and a restaurant. In the bar de-bar-tment, I am now obsessed with All Night Skate, which is not a roller rink but instead a kitschy gay bar at the end of Bed Stuy. I love a bar with varied spaces, and we sat on the second level, which has just a few tables under a low ceiling that you get to through a narrow, spiral staircase. There are lots of different lights and colored panels that makes the bar feel a lot older than it is. You can also play arcade games and order tacos (yummy but flimsy). As much as I love to dance, I liked going to this gay bar on a weeknight that was completely calm. For my chosen food, I have to rave about Xi’an Famous Foods. I’d heard of this local chain and stumbled upon one with my friends. The fast-casual Chinese spot has lots of noodly, bun-y choices, but I went with the spicy cumin lamb hand-ripped noodles because the description said Anthony Bourdain loved it. Not to be Anthony Bourdain, but I loved it, too. I was cursed with my mind loving spicy flavors and my body rejecting spicy temperatures. A watery-eyed, runny-nosed, saucy-chinned experience ensued. I felt like I was at war with my body, trying to knock its sensitivity out in favor of the absolute deliciousness. The noodles are huge. The lamb is hearty. The sauce contains multitudes. This might be one of my favorite things I’ve eaten this year.

I can’t stop repeating the chorus of Sabrina Carpenter’s new single, “Espresso.” Thinkinbou MEeee evrynite OHhhh over and over again. The way the Internet far-right thinks Sydney Sweeney’s blonde, big-breasted persona is bringing back true American values is how I feel about Miss Carpenter’s bombshell easy listening (and also Sydney Sweeney, duh). I was not interested in her music for a long time because I first thought of her as an antagonist against Olivia Rodrigo and that her music was a more forgettable Swift dupe. Yet Spotify Discover can sometimes be called Spotify Discover How Basic You Are, showing me I had no idea what her music really was. “Feather” and “Read Your Mind” piqued my interest, and I was shocked to see that she made these songs that stood out from my workday background music. I was primed for stanning after enjoying her recent internet presence, and I’m okay with liking yet another Disney Channel alumna. If you judge books by their cover, “Espresso’s” cover is just her looking gorgeous, which is exactly what the song is about. I feel like a meme for  loving lyrics such as I’m working late/’cuz I’m a singerrrr. The titular lyrics are That’s that me espresso. That me espresso? The me variety of espresso? I don’t really care what is happening; the song is dreamy, confident, and shallow in all the right ways. Twitter users think Chappell Roan will be the girl to unite Olivia Rodrigo and Sabrina Carpenter, while others think Carpenter and Roan are fighting a proxy war for Rodrigo and Swift. I’m here for the lore. I also think her and Barry Keoghan are so cute. Embracing my norminess since the music is good.

Something silly and stupid for your day. I used to see TikToks on my FYP all the time from Jane Wickline, who would post these sketch comedy videos she does alone from home. I haven’t seen any in a while, but I implore you to watch this scenario of one of those parties where the cup you choose correlates with your relationship status.

I showed my friends Roadhouse last night and was surprised when they didn’t love it as much as I did. It is almost a perfect movie. I’m obviously talking about the original with Patrick Swayze, who might have been the most perfect man in the world. Swayze is built to be idolized and attractive. He is strong but not massive and plays characters that are quiet but not stupid. He was built for both the female and male gazes. Roadhouse is the quintessential portrayal of Swayze sexiness. I don’t need to spoil the movie for anyone who hasn’t seen it, so I’ll reveal things you learn in the first few minutes. Swayze plays a “cooler,” a.k.a. a head bouncer that keeps rambunctious bargoers away, often by force. He is recruited to help turn around a hellacious small-town bar with the worst clientele possible. He and Sam Elliott are so gorgeous in this movie, and they help reinforce my bisexuality. The movie has action, drama, and unintentional comedy. The movie is also super gay, because it’s all about men competing with each other and getting frustrated with how perfect Swayze is. Swayze lets these buffoons talk and get angry at him just for him to kick them into next Tuesday. One of the guys Swayze fights even says I used to f*ck guys like you in prison! which is somehow never revisited. The movie has all kinds of 80s cheese and plot holes, but I don’t see those as detrimental. It’s almost gone from HBO Max, so don’t miss it.

It’s unfortunate that Taylor Swift has somehow populated my feeds even more, but at least I’m starting to see more backlash to the billionaire’s boring albums. The Cut wrote a fascinating article called “Ending a Friendship Over Taylor Swift” about the new relationship-ending opinion that, for some, have surpassed money or politics. Wherever you fall on the Swiftie/Hater spectrum, I recommend seeing what an ideological divide looks like as it’s represented by a person or fandom. It’s almost as if Taylor Swift is a political figure, despite her only speaking out about politics when it benefits her (which maybe makes her even more of a politician). The writer notes that Swifties may take criticsm of Taylor as criticism of themselves, since they “may view the singer-songwriter as an extension of themselves.” I guess it make sense to not want to be around people that yuck your yums, but to end massive relationships over it seems wild. I dislike a lot of the music my friends listen to, but I will not use it as a way to end my friendship with them. Even artists that I think are harmful (Kanye, looking at you!) and I’ll clown my friends for liking wouldn’t be nearly enough to disconnect from them. Also, someone in the article is named Manhattan Turn, which is a funny name.  

A construction crew worked directly outside my living room window for multiple hours on Friday. I sat at my desk and suddenly realized there were people on a makeshift landing fixing something. They were standing almost at my level, their eyes matching mine. It didn’t seem like they looked in and noticed me at all, but I was now hyper-aware of my fishbowl state. I tried to play fun music not just for myself but in hopes it would make their building experience a bit better. Imagine working on the side of a building all day. Anyway, their makeshift platforms were blocking my apartment door, which made for a very New York entrance to my apartment for my friend coming to visit.